I HATE MYSELF

I hate myself right now. I really do!

in the heart is always crying because I miss the family ...
But my world has changed I would my family ..
I've rarely come home ..
Want to live a normal life like everyone else ..
Go home and greet their families ... But one thing that never goes away I was praying for my family ... Although I know that was not enough ...

Today is already four months I did not give smile to my mother  ... Hopefully, my mother understood me Sorry this is not yet fully understand the meaning of family ..
Oh god .. Please keep my mother  and my sister so I could grow up without an ad shortages ..

I WISH I COULD JUST DIE!

Broken Heart

you took the air I’m breathing.And stole my heart.I don’t know what happened.But we fell apart.You left me with a Broken Heart.I know what we’ve been waiting for.But that doesn’t give you the excuse tooo.Then all the reason you can
Especially, my best friend

I don't believe in love anymore

I don't believe in love anymore. I once was love's biggest fan. I loved love. I believed in love at first sight, true love, soul mate, all that mushy-gushy stuff the best songs and books are written about. It's what every little girl dreams about. One day my prince will come....blah blah blah. I used to believe in love. I was in love, like I'm talking head over heals, stars in your eyes in L-O-V-E. I loved you with all my heart even though I knew you weren't perfect. You were always more sure about us. Then we broke up for January, I thought my world would end. But time heals all wounds right?  Then you said you wanted to move in together. And from there we would live happily ever after, you even knew how you wanted to propose but wouldn't tell me the surprise. I was living every girls fantasy. Against the odds we were soul mates made for one another. A lie?  What should I be more upset about my broken dreams and broken heart, or the fact that I fell for it? Only fools fall in love, and love played me like a fiddle. So I don't believe in love anymore. Because if you don't believe in love there is nothing to cry about, and I don't have anymore tears to cry. So I gave up on love because it gave up on me.

To My Best friend

To my best friend, 

Wherever you may be, I just wanted to let you know that you are amazing. I wanted to thank you for everything you have ever done for me. You have always been there when I needed you, and you were always by my side when times got rough. I want to thank you for trusting me, and listening to me when I needed you to. I wanted to let you know that everything you do means a lot to me even though it seems as if most of it is trivial and stupid. I wanted to thank you for letting me help you, even though I know that you really know how to do whatever it is that I help you with. 

It's only been three, almost two years since I met you, but it seems like its been a lifetime. I never really thought that I would get to know you so well, in the beginning I used to make fun of you behind your back. Then I got to know you, and I grew fond of you. I began to see who the real you was. I learned to see the good in people because of you. 

I know you will never see this, and I'm ok with that. This post is to you, for you, about you, and dedicated to you. Even though I never got to tell you this in person, and even though it slipped once before, I just wanted to say I love you. From the bottom most part of my soul I want to say I love you. I want to stand atop the largest buildings and shout it to the world, but sadly these words will fall upon deaf ears. 

You are the only person I have ever felt this way for, and I will never forget you. 

To all of those who read this, this is tribute to my best friend. he is everything to me, and I can never tell him how I feel. It's far too complicated to spell out for anyone, and I want you to all know the even if you cant have the one you love, there is still hope. Even if its a glimmer, or the faintest sliver, there is still a hope. My hope is that one day he will realize how I feel, and that I fell for her years ago. I know that you love her, and that we are best friends. I know that you know I have feelings for you, and I'm glad you didn't drive me away when you found out.

When you smile I smile

I


'd wait on you forever and a day 
Hand and foot 
Your world is my world 
Yeah 
Ain't no way you're ever gon' get 
Any less than you should 
Cause baby 
You smile I smile 
Cause whenever 
You smile I smile 
Your lips, my biggest weakness 
Shouldn't have let you know 
I'm always gonna do what they say (hey) 
If you need me 
I'll come right there 
From a thousand miles away 
When you smile I smile (oh whoa) 
You smile I smile 
Baby take my open heart and all it offers 
Cause this is as unconditional as it'll ever get 
You ain't seen nothing yet 
I won't ever hesitate to give you more 
Cause baby (hey) 
You smile I smile (whoa) 
You smile I smile 
Hey hey hey 
You smile I smile 
I smile I smile I smile 
You smile I smile 
Make me smile baby 
Baby you won't ever work for nothing 
You are my ins and my means now 
With you there's no in between 
I'm all in 
Cause my cards are on the table 
And I'm willing and I'm able 
But I fold to your wish 
Cause it's my command 
You smile I smile 

Imagine my surprise when you loved me back

"Imagine my surprise when you loved me back."

I read that message on a Postsecret postcard not long ago and it really spoke to me. When I've been hurt and abandoned its easy to go on expecting the same from everyone else. So when someone comes along, be it human or animal, with a real, true, sincere love that they give back to you, that "surprising" love can make you whole again. I know that uncounted broken hearts have been repaired by the unconditional love given by animals, but this healing love goes both ways.

Like I do

STATUS

Mr.X

you can't make someone love you

unknow

weheartit + ffffound

His hair, falls perfectly without him trying. His eyes, shine perfectly when he’s smiling. He took my perfume, sprayed it on himself and said, “so I can smell of you”. I melted. I never really wanted to think I was in love with him, I just thought I want what I cant have, but no, now I know without a shadow of a doubt. I’m in love with him, and if it’s possible to love someone more everyday, I love him more everyday. I hate him. I hate him so much, I loathe his being. And yet I cant help myself, i'm like putty in his hands, I want to hug him, kiss him, hold his hand, I want to feel the beat of his heart, his warm touch next to mine. And yet all of these things are impossible. For now. I’ve set myself a goal, I’m not going to give up without a fight. I know that at least if I don’t give up, I will be able to accept defeat if the time comes, if I try my very hardest. But I know that in the end, you can't make someone love you. So I’ll wait. Always.

I still Love you,Damn it

It happened two weeks ago, yet it seems like it happened just yesterday. I had planned to propose moving in together in two weeks, but before I could do that, you left me. Never before have I been hurt that bad. I can't fall asleep anymore, I find it so damn difficult to concentrate on anything.

For the first four or so days I was shocked. I wondered if you ever really loved me. We were together for two years, yet you dumped my by sending me a letter. Yes, a damned letter. I should be angry, I should be furious. I want to be mad at you. But I simply can't. I keep wishing for a bloody time machine so I could just roll back everything we've done and said to each other. I just want you back - I still love you.
I try to think of everything bad that happened between us - I try to cling onto all the bad memories that we shared. And then I suddenly realise - I even miss those. I miss all our fights, I miss how we used to kiss and make up. I wanted to propose to you, I wanted to grow old together. I wanted to give you my life and in exchange I only asked for your love.

The day before yesterday was Christmas Eve. I spent it alone. If things were different, we would have celebrated our decision to move in together that night. But things weren't different. I just can't stand it anymore.

I promised to love you forever, no matter how naive that sounds. And I was going to hold up to that promise. And no matter what - I still will.

I still love you, damn it.